Archive by Author

The Value of Being Bored

28 Oct

Most of us are constantly occupied nowadays; if we’re not working, we’ve got other responsibilities and in our free time, we’ll be watching TV, online, reading a magazine – the list is endless.

Yesterday I arrived 30 minutes early for a class I was going to; I had to wait outside in my car and I immediately started to think about what I could do to fill the time – listen to the radio, make some telephone calls, write some notes?  In the end I decided to just sit and do nothing, half an hour of allowing my mind to wander wherever it wanted – and do you know what?  It was probably one of the most valuable parts of my day.

When you think about it, we very rarely allow ourselves to just sit and do absolutely nothing.  We are so afraid of being bored that we are always looking for something to do.  However, by giving ourselves some space to do nothing, just letting ourselves daydream aimlessly for a while, this can give our minds the real downtime they need.  Just like soil needs to have some fallow time to restore itself, so do our minds.

So, next time you’re sitting in traffic or waiting in a supermarket queue, don’t get frustrated, take the opportunity to let your mind off the lead and have a wander.  You might just come up with a solution to a particular problem or an amazing idea without even having to try.

Visualise to Succeed

18 Oct

Visualisation is an amazingly simple way to help us achieve our goals and get our desired outcome.  I have used this to great effect recently with one of my personal goals – running my first 10k race.

In the past I have had a real psychological barrier with running; I used to get out of breath very quickly and would often just give up and stop running after a very short time.  The furthest I had ever run was 5k and that was a struggle.

When I started studying hypnotherapy and NLP, I looked at my thought processes in more detail and realised that whenever I started running, I would be calculating in my head when I would stop for a break.  I would actually visualise myself stopping at a certain point and that is what always happened.  The consequence is that I got disheartened and convinced myself that I just couldn’t run.

So, time for a change!  I decided to enter my first 10k race and to achieve that I knew I had to alter my way of thinking.  Whenever I went for a run I would first visualise myself running the whole route, looking comfortable and still going strong at the end.  This had amazing results and the first time I used the technique I ran over 8km, much further than I had ever done before.

Yesterday I completed my 10k, much faster than I expected and I loved every minute of it!  Of course, I did plenty of training to get myself physically in condition, however, the mental element was crucial.  Before the race, I visualised myself completing the course and running over the finishing line in good time.

This may sound deceptively simple, but it works!  Think of something that you want to achieve and give it a go – just spend a few moments seeing yourself getting the outcome you want.  Whatever you focus on, you’ll get; so if you see yourself failing, you probably will.  See yourself succeeding and you really can achieve anything.

I’d love to hear your personal experiences of this, so get in touch and let me know how you get on…

Enjoying the Journey

7 Oct

It’s generally accepted that it’s important to have goals in life. Most self-help books agree on this point and encourage us to set well-defined goals that we can work towards in order to move forwards.  Goal-setting is certainly something I use with clients and it’s an integral part of life-coaching.

However, achieving our goals is not the be-all and end-all; we shouldn’t put off being happy until we get a new job, lose two stone or find our perfect partner. 

Achieving one goal consists of many small steps along the way – some may take us forwards and some may take us backwards, so why not take time to enjoy each one?

Relish each step forward; congratulate yourself and celebrate your achievement – allow yourself to enjoy it.

If you feel that you’ve taken a step backwards, don’t beat yourself up.  You can use this as an opportunity to see how you can do things differently next time.

Have a think now about a particular goal that you’re working towards at the moment.  Take some time to appreciate how far you’ve come; and if you haven’t started yet, why not take your first step now,  it only has to be small. Most importantly of all, enjoy it!

A Different Perspective

30 Sep

I have been doing a lot of work over the last couple of weeks on perspective and it’s surprising how beneficial it can be to simply change your viewpoint on a particular situation.

Often when we are in a difficult situation it can seem overwhelming; negative thoughts and feelings stream into our mind and we can’t see any way out of it. However, there is a simple and effective technique we can use to mentally step back from the problem and gain some perspective.

When you are struggling with something or someone and perhaps you have woken up in the middle of the night and can’t get it out of your head, create a picture of the situation or person in your mind. Notice whether this picture is in colour and, if it is, change it to black and white. Once you have done this, start to make the picture dull and fuzzy, as if it has been dropped into a puddle. Finally, start to shrink the picture down and push it away from you until it becomes a small dot in the distance. Notice how you feel about the situation or person now – if you practise this technique, I guarantee you will feel better.

Allowing yourself to mentally step out of a situation and become a detached observer will often help you to see that it’s not overwhelming at all. You can cope with it – you just need to take a step back and get things into perspective. Using the above technique will start to train your unconscious mind to do this automatically, so why not use it the next time you’re finding something or someone difficult.

Let me know how you get on …..

What is Hypnotherapy?

21 Sep

Hypnotherapy can easily be misunderstood; you may have visions of a stage hypnotist getting you to do ridiculous things in front of hundreds of people, of being out of control and having your mind meddled with – scary! Using hypnotherapy in a therapeutic way is VERY different.

Richard Bandler, one of the creators of NLP, has said that ‘Everything is hypnosis’ and that we simply move from one trance to another. Hypnotherapy involves accessing and working with the subconscious mind which is constantly being bombarded with information. The thing is that our subconscious is not subjective; it simply stores whatever is thrown at it – this can be positive, however, it can also influence us negatively. The subconscious is hugely powerful, but it needs direction and we can achieve this through hypnosis.

Using hypnotherapy we can first recognise what isn’t working and then replace it with a new way that does – simple! And, it’s a completely collaborative process; hypnosis is not something that’s ‘done to you’, it’s a way of working with me as your therapist to achieve your goals.

Food for thought – why not contact me and tell me what you want to change about your life? Then we can get started doing something about it. How exciting is that?

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